It's been quite a week in Washington and around the world. Here are your talking points for when you encounter the unenlightened:
*One last time, US Attorneys do indeed serve at the pleasure of the President and, yes, EVERY President fires their US Attorneys-AT THE BEGINNING OF THE TERM. But the Bush Administration's current round of firings are purely political and may constitute obstruction of justice (See: 18 USC 1512 paragraph C, look it up). The administration gave these attorneys high marks in job performance reviews and were among the most effective prosecutors in the country. In the past 25 years, only 10 US Attorneys have been fired for non-misconduct and early-term turnaround, while Bush and Co. fired 8 in one round. It's unprecedented. The only mistake these attorneys made was going after Republicans when they did something illegal-something Bush does not want. Proof: the 4-to-1 ratio at which this Justice Department indicted Democrats over Republicans. The actual statistical chances of that ratio being legitimate is 10,000 to 1. You figure it out.
*Half of the American troops killed in Iraq were kill with weapons from arms depots WE left unguarded. Another Rumsfeld failure.
*80 percent of children today do NOT want to be President.
*How come when the Irish were blowing up the UK every Boston tavern cheered and many Irish-Americans sent money to the IRA terrorist? While if a Muslim even has a friend of a friend of a friend of a terrorist they get sent to Gitmo? Don't answer, it will only come out racist.
*John McCain has relaunched his "Straight Talk Express" bus. It's a totally different bus now but that's okay because he now has a totally different set of beliefs than when he ran in 2000.
*Yes, there is something wrong with Halliburton moving to Dubai, UAE. It's a terrorist state with a shiny coat of paint. Why we haven't bomb them is beyond me.
*Have the housewives who buy "People" magazine for Angelina Jolie & Brad Pitt ever paid 10 bucks to see one of their movies? I just haven't seen a lot of Sally Soccermoms lining up for "Babel."
*Speaking of Hollywood, people love "The Sopranos" for the same reason they hate "Lost."
*If the television program you are watching features either Glenn Beck or Ann Coulter, it is NOT a news program!
*If you really want to end illegal immigration to this country then here's the secret: Fine the employers a lot of money per undocumented worker. You stop the fuel, you stop the fire. Don't believe me? Mexico has been the same shithole 1000 years ago as it is now but yet virtually no Mexicans migrated here during the turn of the last century. Why? Because employers were hiring the Euporeans over the Mexicans. Mexicans didn't even bother coming here in high numbers because they knew there were no jobs for them. The dirty secret is that corporations LOVE illegal immigrants and that is why they are here. Anyone who sees border patrols as the answer just wants to shoot at brown people.
*"To announce that there must be no criticism of the President or that we are to stand by the President, right or wrong, is not only unpatriotic and servile, it is morally treasonable to the American public." -President Theodore Roosevelt (a Republican President). They don't make Republicans like him or Lincoln anymore.
*How come you can't find Ronald Reagan movies anywhere?
*Yes, you can raise the minimum wage and not effect the price of goods. The market determines prices, NOT labor. Econ 101.
*Current technology allows us to double our average fuel economy to 35 mpg's and not miss a step. What kind of person would be against that and who taught them to think that way?
*We were supposed to have a national solar energy bank by the year 2000.
*Speaking of the year 2000, according to "The Jetson's" and "2001" and others, we were supposed to have flying cars, trans-Solar System travel, robot servants and food pills. What happened that the adults of the 1950's and 60's could conceive these ideas but the children of that era were never able to achieve these? Our goals have shrank considerably. All we expect now are slightly improved videogame consoles every 6 years, a different colored iPod every few months and prescription drugs with various side effects that may or may not kill you. Sad.
*"Hollywood liberal" "ACLU-type" "atheist" and "Northeastern elite" are all code for "Jew."
*Lastly, if Alberto Gonzales gets the boot, then the enjoyment of legal, consentual adult entertainment can continue. The fact that Tera Patrick is as high a priority to this Justice Department as national security is a travesty. Hey, Gonzo-"It's TERROR that's important NOT Tera." You can use that one.